Blog

19 Oct

The Truth About Why Adoptive Parents Need Support

“How do meals help families returning home from adopting a new child?”  One of my friends came to visit us after we had returned home from Thailand with our daughter and asked this sincere question.  It’s true, I think most people don’t fully understand the stress that an adjustment period brings when a new child is added to a family through adoption.  Most can identify with bringing home a new infant and how much work and weary that can be;...

30 Sep

Grace when it is hard.

My sweet husband and I were able to leave town overnight yesterday.  My mom could help, and one kiddo had a birthday party sleepover….the older kids all had plans.  We left town shortly after lunch time yesterday and were home by 4pm today.  In theory, this is a manageable thing.  In reality….we managed.  The kids did great.   They had fun on their sleep-overs.  They behaved great….until we all got home.  My husband and I had a blast.  We laughed, we held...

23 Sep

Grace

In adoption, Grace can mean so many things.  Grace to accept prayers as a family waits.  Grace to ask for prayer when a family struggles.  Grace to know when we need bigger help…….Grace to say that even when it is hard, it can also be right. We need grace to wrestle with whether to start the journey again, when to lay it down, when to set it aside.  We need grace to walk with other families on the hard journey of...

14 Sep

Grace in the interactions

Two days ago, I returned from my fourth trip to Congo to spend time with the incredible and humble ministry, Mwana Villages. Among many other purposes for this trip, what will stick with me about this particular trip is that I got to take a front row seat to one of the biggest days in any family’s life: the day they meet their child. And as I reflect on what we experienced, I think on the concept of Grace. It’s...

19 Aug

Tribes rock.

We all need a tribe.  A tribe consists of your people, your family and friends and teachers and neighbors…..and we need a tribe to raise our children.  One important person in my tribe is my friend Jen.  We were having babies in the same season, in a women’s bible study together.  About the time we adopted our daughter Precious, our bible study was disbanding because of busy lives and young children…..My only sibling had recently divorced the only one I...

05 Aug

We can strive to do at least something….mostly right.

We can’t do everything right.  We seriously just can’t.  Some families try harder than others, but I think we can all agree that we mostly want to get it right.  Tonight I got to read a paper my oldest daughter wrote for her final speech of her junior year of high school.  It was timely for me to read it now.  She was finally purging her backpack which she avoided most of the summer.  We have been discussing plans for after...

28 Jul

when it feels hard-thoughts on our open adoption

Today, my 2 adopted kiddos and I spent time with our youngest son’s birth family.  I keep in contact with them, mostly through social media.  I knew they were getting together in a nearby town this weekend so this morning I sent a message to figure out if and when we could connect.  For me…….it is hard to try to make this happen.  I want it to happen in theory….but in reality…..we are busy.  We have a busy family.  Let’s...

24 Jul

5 tips for parenting

I recently listened to a wise godly older mother give a presentation to adoptive and foster moms at our ministry staff conference. I appreciated Dottie McDowell’s (From Josh McDowell Ministries) advice to us younger moms and am sharing my notes with readers of this blog.  Dream with your children. Proverbs 13:12 “Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a desire fulfilled is a tree of life.” Even my small children have dreams. I want to engage with them in their...

03 Jul

Trusting the bigger picture

God is just amazing.   There are scripture passages that I learned as a child that continue to amaze me with their depth, passages like “in ALL things God works together for the good of those who love him, who are called according to his purpose.” These are familiar, comfort verses. But the longer we walk our faith journey and more life experiences we have, the deeper my amazement is at the PRACTICAL, real, you-can-count-on-it TRUTH of these passages.   I have been marveling lately at the...

01 Jul

a reflection

There is a great model for nurturing parenting available at circleofsecurity.org.  It is part of a larger training that parents can take from someone officially trained, and there are local providers who are trained.  On the website are also hand out sheets that people can look at.  Once such handout has this at the bottom.  I share it here because it is good for all of us to remember, and even though I have been through the training, and reviewed...