I feel like maybe my thoughts have been a little bit on the “downer” side lately. God has been allowing me to wrestle with some thoughts on the brokenness of this world and ultimately it comes back to reliance on Him … for everything. I always enjoy the holidays and look forward to the things we do to celebrate the birth of Christ and just having time together as a family … without distractions. Even through the good times of this week, the past few days have brought thoughts on brokenness and how I wish so many days that we didn’t have to deal with the brokenness of life. I know it is unavoidable and that, really, it is in the brokenness that we know we need a Savior. In our arrogant humanness we can think that we have it all covered and can do it “all on our own” when the reality is, at some point, we desperately need Him.
One definition that can be found for brokenness is “reduced to fragments.” That feels like a good visual when I think of that word. In mine and my Husband’s families we have not had to deal with loss through death and disease. We have not had losses related to long or short illnesses that have taken those we love. The brokenness we have dealt with has been related (I believe in each scenario) to personal choices made by someone that has resulted in a snowball of other things being affected. Sometimes I wish that we didn’t have that to deal with it. I wish that these choices hadn’t been made that have resulted in divorce, personal destruction and loss of relationship. I have been reminded in this that there have been positive things that have come from these decisions as there are certain people we wouldn’t have in our lives if it weren’t for remarriage. I still believe that God’s perfect plan calls for a restoration of relationships rather than divorce, but again, there is that brokenness word again (reduced to fragments). Not every situation is going to be restored by us because decisions are being made by imperfect humans.
God has reminded me again this week that adoption also comes out of brokenness. There is something that has occurred that creates a need for a child to be brought into a new family. It is because of brokenness that we have our sweet girl, and also because of brokenness that we are able to bring into our family another child through adoption. There is grief, loss and imperfection in this whole adoption thing … brokenness. I realize that this isn’t a revelation to anyone. It is just a good reminder to me when I am feeling discouraged at the level of brokenness that we endure each day, God is still in it, and He is working to redeem, even through this brokenness. God does not leave us in the brokenness; He pulls and restores us from the “fragments” if we allow Him to!