For more than a year now, I have participated in the Katelyn's Fund ministry as a giver. When I blog, it is in a voice of encouraging, teaching, supporting, etc. When I read the blogs on the Katelyn's Fund site, it is usually to make sure I haven't written something redundant to what was written recently, etc.
Today, that changed for me. A week ago, we made a family decision to start a new adoption process. We decided it….then just let it sit awhile. We haven't made a "big announcement"…but rather just a few quiet, gaurded conversations, or a few hints dropped on my other blog. It's not that we are not excited….or eager….but we are really scared. We want to adopt a specific child from a specific country and that is just plain hard. We prayed for weeks and weeks and months even about this, and God has clearly turned our hearts to adopting again, through scripture, through prayer, through dreams, through the knowledge of His will for us, and how He wants us to live our days on earth. But it's so big and so ominous…..and we're just nervous. And a bit paralyzed for the moment. The application sits on the table. Her pictures are all over our house. I'm starting to read scripture and blogs like this Katelyn's Fund blog, with a new voice…..one who receives and doesn't give wisdom and encouragement and support. Isn't that crazy, how the perspective can shift overnight? Isn't it wonderful that there is a place to go to receive prayer and words of affirmation and encouragement? I think so. I'm very grateful to the family of katelyn's Fund today. The last 3 blogs I read this past week were about stepping forward in faith, trusting the Lord, and casting aside fear. Well. There you have it.
This morning I read these words written byt Beth Moore, "Sometimes we stand to learn the most about God from the situations we understand the least." That's very true. It's true of missions, of adoption, and of submitting and yielding our own will to obey the will of the Father. Ultimately, I am confident that I will learn much about God as we step forward on this new journey in our family. I don't understand one little bit of it, or how its ever gonna happen….but I do know just a little bit about the God who made this plan. For today, that's going to be enough.
Have a blessed weekend everyone, and enjoy the love and fellowship of family and friends, and the knowledge of the Saviour who loves each of you very, very much.